Coping With the Death of a Child
Comfort for grieving parents
My son’s birthday is today. Jewish tradition places great importance on the day of a person’s death, the yahrzeit, but not so much on the day of birth. Ever since my parents passed away, I observe their yahrzeits each year. I just never think about their birthdays. After I lost my son Jacob, his birthday... Continue Reading →
I lost my son at the young age of 24. The sadness of child loss never goes away, and I thought the intensity would diminish over time. Instead it seems that, in some ways, coping with child loss is harder for me now than it was then. Even though my son passed away a while ago,... Continue Reading →
I’m a member of an exclusive club. It’s called the child loss club. I didn't ask to join it. The dues are extremely high. Sometimes the dues are so high I wonder how I’ll get through another month. I’ve tried reaching out to the membership office (aka Heaven) but no one answers, so I can’t... Continue Reading →
One of the Hardest Things for Me to Do is Visit My Son’s Grave. Although it’s been over two years since my son suddenly passed away at 24 years of age, I dread going to the cemetery. I even get depressed just thinking about going. Carrying the grief of child loss, sadness and depression doesn't... Continue Reading →
What Can I Say To a Parent Losing a Child Through Violence? Parents are burying their children in Uvalde, Texas. Although I have also lost a child, I can’t even imagine what I could say to parents are suffering child loss through violence. There are just no words. Judaism teaches that everything has a reason.... Continue Reading →
Living In An Intense Stage Of Grief It’s been a bit more than two years since my son passed away at age 24. Whereas the intense sadness, anger, and depression have subsided, at times I still find myself agitated and miserable. These moments are usually the result of a physical or emotional trigger like being... Continue Reading →
The Problem Of Trying To Parent My Child Beyond Childhood In my post Dealing with Guilt and Hashgacha Pratit, I discussed how G-d has a plan for me and orchestrates my every life event. I do what I can do within human limitations, but beyond that, it's up to Him. I'm suffering from child loss... Continue Reading →
Types of Therapy, Pros and Cons In my post Who Can I talk To About Child Loss, I discussed talking with a grief therapist, a support group, one’s friends, and G-d to find relief from the emotional turmoil one finds oneself after the death of a child. Now I’ll discuss the pros and cons of... Continue Reading →
A Life Story Cut Short My husband and I attend a support group for bereaved parents. All of us had a child who passed away as an adult. One person mentioned that it’s very painful to watch her child’s friends growing in their careers, getting married, and moving on with their lives. Memories of her... Continue Reading →
Which Yahrzeit Should I Observe? The anniversary of a person’s passing on the Jewish calendar is called a yahrzeit. In Yiddish, yahrzeit means ‘year time’, and is the time once a year when Jewish people acknowledge their loved ones by lighting a candle, saying Kaddish in synagogue, performing mitzvot, and studying Torah. A yahrzeit is... Continue Reading →
In my post ‘Is It OK To Be Angry At G-d’, I spoke about misdirected anger at family, friends, and strangers. I was angry at G-d for taking away by beloved son and wondered if I had the right to be angry with Him. It’s been almost two years since Jacob passed away, and at... Continue Reading →
My Son Has Died - How Should I Celebrate His Birthday? When someone has passed away, I usually think about acknowledging their yahrzeit, the date of the person’s passing. Knowing what to do on a yarhzeit is pretty straightforward for me - I’ll light a candle, give tzedakah, etc. For how we acknowledged Jacob’s first... Continue Reading →
Coping With the Death of a Child 