Coping With the Death of a Child
Comfort for grieving parents
Which Yahrzeit Should I Observe? The anniversary of a person’s passing on the Jewish calendar is called a yahrzeit. In Yiddish, yahrzeit means ‘year time’, and is the time once a year when Jewish people acknowledge their loved ones by lighting a candle, saying Kaddish in synagogue, performing mitzvot, and studying Torah. A yahrzeit is... Continue Reading →
In my post ‘Is It OK To Be Angry At G-d’, I spoke about misdirected anger at family, friends, and strangers. I was angry at G-d for taking away by beloved son and wondered if I had the right to be angry with Him. It’s been almost two years since Jacob passed away, and at... Continue Reading →
My Son Has Died - How Should I Celebrate His Birthday? When someone has passed away, I usually think about acknowledging their yahrzeit, the date of the person’s passing. Knowing what to do on a yarhzeit is pretty straightforward for me - I’ll light a candle, give tzedakah, etc. For how we acknowledged Jacob’s first... Continue Reading →
Bereaved Parents Have Different Needs For Different Situations Everyone is different as to how, when, and if, they will accept comfort over losing a child. The how, where, and when of each loss is different for each situation. A parent mourning the death of a child after a long illness may require a different sort... Continue Reading →
Our Sages say when misfortune befalls, one should look at ones deeds. I sometimes ask myself ‘What did I do wrong that my son should pass away? What did he do wrong to cause an early death?’ However, I should be asking a different and much more insightful question. But more on that later. Various... Continue Reading →
It’s funny how feelings change with the passing of time. Although sadness over my son’s passing hasn’t gone away, and never will, it certainly has changed and now goes in a different direction. When Jacob first passed away and for some significant time after, I couldn’t bear to look at any of his personal stuff.... Continue Reading →
A New Chapter In Grief And Mourning I’m in the middle of the second year of my son’s passing. Until now, I thought about Jacob constantly. From the time I awoke in the morning until the time I went to bed at night, my thoughts were on him. Now, for some reason, I don’t think... Continue Reading →
This Nagging Question Never Dies There’s been a lot going on here so I haven’t been writing in awhile. I recently called a good friend and said to her ‘I wish I could tell you my life is so happy and that everything is going really super.’ I feel bad because I usually call her... Continue Reading →
Rosh Hashanah is a holiday of contradictions for me. On the one hand, I approach the New Year with solemnity, a serious demeanor, praying that G-d blesses me, my family, and all the Jewish people, with a year of physical and spiritual health and happiness. On the other hand, I have a festive holiday meal,... Continue Reading →
Every Night I Hope My Son Will Come Back To Me In My Dreams Sometimes I have a dream about loved ones who have passed away. My parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles, I miss them so much and I wish they were here with me. I’ve always wondered about the meaning of these dreams. Are... Continue Reading →
I’m in the second year of my son’s passing and I feel like I’m still in a dream. In this horrible dream, Jacob passed away. He’s no longer with me. Problem is, I can’t wake up from this dream. Every morning I awaken and a small piece of me hopes he’s still here, upstairs in... Continue Reading →
I Just Don't Feel Sad On Tisha B'Av Here we are again. Another Tisha B’Av and we’re still here. By ‘here’, I mean we’re still away from our Beit Hamikdosh, our Holy Temple. We’re still away from living in our land as it was meant to be lived in. On Tisha B’Av the custom is... Continue Reading →
Coping With the Death of a Child 