My Son Has Died - How Should I Celebrate His Birthday? When someone has passed away, I usually think about acknowledging their yahrzeit, the date of the person’s passing. Knowing what to do on a yarhzeit is pretty straightforward for me - I’ll light a candle, give tzedakah, etc. For how we acknowledged Jacob’s first … Continue reading Birthdays Are For The Living
Bereaved Parents Have Different Needs For Different Situations Everyone is different as to how, when, and if, they will accept comfort over losing a child. The how, where, and when of each loss is different for each situation. A parent mourning the death of a child after a long illness may require a different sort … Continue reading What To Say, (and What Not To Say), To Someone Who Has Lost a Child
Our Sages say when misfortune befalls, one should look at ones deeds. I sometimes ask myself ‘What did I do wrong that my son should pass away? What did he do wrong to cause an early death?’ However, I should be asking a different and much more insightful question. But more on that later. Various … Continue reading Can Children Die For The Sins Of Their Parents?
It’s funny how feelings change with the passing of time. Although sadness over my son’s passing hasn’t gone away, and never will, it certainly has changed and now goes in a different direction. When Jacob first passed away and for some significant time after, I couldn’t bear to look at any of his personal stuff. … Continue reading Lighting My Son’s Chanukah Menorah
A New Chapter In Grief And Mourning I’m in the middle of the second year of my son’s passing. Until now, I thought about Jacob constantly. From the time I awoke in the morning until the time I went to bed at night, my thoughts were on him. Now, for some reason, I don’t think … Continue reading To Mourn Or Not To Mourn?