Six years ago, my son Jacob was buried on Purim. This year, I began to reflect on the mitzvot of the day and how they connect to my experience of child loss. Surprisingly, two Purim mitzvot stood out for me: Matanot La’Evyonim—giving charity to those in need—and Mishloach Manot—sharing gifts of food with one another.... Continue Reading →
Grief Through Winter’s Embrace – Thoughts on My Child’s Yahrzeit
This year is my son's 6th yahrzeit. I can't believe so many years have gone by. I remember the day he passed; seems like yesterday. It's winter now, and the cemetery grounds are covered under a blanket of pristine, white snow. Winter has a way of muting sharp edges—of trees, of stones, of grief. And... Continue Reading →
Keeping a Child’s Memory Alive – Ways for Making it Real
For the first few years after my son Jacob passed away, it was difficult for me to look at his picture or touch the few things he left behind. The wallet, the souvenirs from school trips, school yearbooks, the knick-knacks from his vacations, the Mother's Day and birthday gifts he gave me. All this was... Continue Reading →
How Can You Mend a Broken Heart After Losing a Child?
I was thinking about my child more than usual recently. Not having enough distractions keeping me busy, I thought of Jacob. Five years after his passing, the tears still flowed. That nagging question keeps coming back: How can you mend a broken heart after losing a child? Will I ever live a normal life? I... Continue Reading →
I Lost a Child. What Do I Say to Another Grieving Parent?
Sometimes I find myself speaking to another parent who recently experienced the loss of a child. I lost my child five years ago, but how do I comfort someone whose loss is very fresh? What do I say to another grieving parent? Different Emotional Dynamics of Child Loss First, let's look at the different emotional... Continue Reading →
Child Loss at Any Age: Grief and Statistics
Child loss is an unimaginable pain. Whether it’s the heart wrenching experience of miscarriage, losing an infant, a small child, an adolescent, or an adult child, these types of losses evoke profound parental grief. However, parents react differently to different types of loss because each grief journey has its unique challenges. Also, society treats these... Continue Reading →
On Child Loss: the Shortest Post I’ve Ever Written
This is the shortest post I've ever written on child loss. Because there are just no words. In memory of Ariel and Kfir Bibas, and their mother Shiri. May their memories be a blessing.
Navigating My Child’s 5th Yahrzeit: Reflection and Growth
Yahrzeit, a Yiddish term meaning 'year time', is a significant observance in Judaism that commemorates the anniversary of a loved one's passing. This occasion provides an opportunity to reflect and remember the life of those we have lost. Yahrzeit milestones are key anniversaries that mark a special window of time from the first date of... Continue Reading →
A Letter to My Departed Child on His Birthday
Hi son, we haven't spoken in a while. First, let's catch up on what we've been doing. We Missed You On Chanukah Jacob's football Chanukah menorah, gifted to him when he was four years old We spent Shabbat Chanukah with your brothers and their families. It was very nice, and it was like the whole... Continue Reading →
Loss and Connecting With Our Loved Ones Through Tehillim
Tehillim, also known as the Book of Psalms, is an extraordinary collection of sacred poetry cherished by Jewish communities and people of faith around the world. Composed of 150 individual psalms, this ancient text offers wisdom, comfort, and inspiration. After child loss, connecting with our loved ones through Tehillim brings tremendous benefit to both parent... Continue Reading →
Sorry For That Last Picture
My recent Chanukah post showed a happy family gathered around what was supposed to be a Chanukah menorah. I used AI to generate the picture, and unfortunately, didn't take a good look at it before I posted. The menorah had a center candle, the shamash, and three candles on either side. Of course, a Chanukah... Continue Reading →
Celebrating Chanukah: Dealing with Family, Love, and Loss
It's almost that time of year again - Chanukah. Lighting the menorah, the gift giving, jelly donuts and chocolate gelt. There's a lot to look forward to. Even more, I always look forward to celebrating holidays with the whole family. With a son on the west coast and another on the east coast, it rarely... Continue Reading →