Coping With the Death of a Child
Comfort for grieving parents
Chanukah is around the corner and I’m already thinking about how I’m going to handle another holiday without my son. Every year it seems to get harder. Thank G-d, we will be with family and I’ll light his menorah. But I wonder, how does he celebrate Chanukah in Heaven? I don’t think he lights candles... Continue Reading →
Every few weeks I go to the cemetery and trim the grass over my child's grave. ( Why the cemetery isn’t doing this is a long story, so don’t ask ) Next to Jacob are two graves of young adults who died around the same age, one in his mid twenties, the other in his... Continue Reading →
The post How I'm Honoring My Child's Memory, discusses how my husband and I are honoring our son's memory. We talked about doing mitzvos (good deeds), learning Torah, and giving tzedakah (charity) as a few of the many ways to remember a child. Another wonderful way to honor a child's memory is by emulating the... Continue Reading →
Parents and teachers are sometimes afraid to talk to young children about death. ‘They’re too young’ or ‘They won’t understand’ are a few of the justifications to avoid speaking about this topic. The fear of talking to young children about death is unfounded, and is based on our own adult discomfort about the subject. In... Continue Reading →
Shabbat is a beautiful day, an island in time, in which I relax and connect with G-d. I enjoy the special foods, prayers, and having time to learn. I like preparing for Shabbat. I enjoy the smell of a hot crockpot filled with cholent on Friday afternoon. However, Shabbat is also emotionally hard for me.... Continue Reading →
As I mentioned in the post Therapy for Traumatic Grief, finding the right grief therapist can be challenging. Sometimes it takes working with a few before the right one comes along. After I lost my child, finally found a good therapist who taught me several methods to help cope with loss. In the words of... Continue Reading →
A good friend of our family, Murray Friedman, recently passed away at 92 years of age. He was in good health until the end, when G-d called his soul back to Heaven. How do I compare Murray’s life to the life of my son Jacob? Murray had a long life, 92 years, in which he... Continue Reading →
Grief comes in many forms for different people. Those who have lost a sibling, spouse, or parent experience grief differently from those who suffer grief due to child loss. Mental health professionals categorize grief into several types. One of these types is prolonged grief, a grief experienced by most bereaved parents. This article discusses the... Continue Reading →
Intrusive and negative thoughts affect grieving parents a lot. These thoughts come at random times and seem to have a life of their own. Meditation is a very useful activity to deal these thoughts either by eliminating them, or directing them appropriately. I’ve found meditation helps me control painful thoughts and calms me down. What... Continue Reading →
Art therapy is a valuable tool that helps people cope with trauma. In particular, parents suffering from child loss find art therapy useful to express painful emotions they can’t otherwise communicate. How does creating art help parents cope with such tragedy? To fully understand the benefits of art therapy as a means of coping with... Continue Reading →
I want to address 4 feelings and thoughts about child loss that afflict me and other bereaved parents. These feelings are the most common among those who suffer from child loss. Bereaved parents have jumbled and conflicting emotions coping with the loss of a child, and these painful feelings and thoughts affect our self perception... Continue Reading →
My son’s birthday is today. Jewish tradition places great importance on the day of a person’s death, the yahrzeit, but not so much on the day of birth. Ever since my parents passed away, I observe their yahrzeits each year. I just never think about their birthdays. After I lost my son Jacob, his birthday... Continue Reading →
Coping With the Death of a Child 