A person in my grief support group once asked what her child does in the next world. Is he just laying there, waiting for Moshiach and the Resurrection? On the contrary, our Sages teach that our departed child continues to look out for us from a place of eternal love and protection. Losing a child... Continue Reading →
Hope and Joy Amidst Grief: the Three Weeks
The Jewish calendar mirrors life with ups and downs. A particularly challenging period for the Jewish community is the final two weeks of the month of Tammuz and the initial week of Av. This time period is known as 'the three weeks' during which our people have experienced numerous tragedies, including the devastating loss of... Continue Reading →
Child Loss is More Than Losing A Child
Before my son Jacob passed away as a young adult, I rarely heard the term child loss. Of course, I knew such things happened, but I didn’t know anyone who suffered through the experience. Child loss meant losing a child, and that was that. After I lost my own child, I realized that child loss... Continue Reading →
Turning Points in the Journey of Grief
It’s been four years since my adult son Jacob passed away, and my grief is very different from what it was back then. Some things are the same. But I feel the grief of child loss is like a journey. A journey I never wanted to go on, but a journey with turning points and... Continue Reading →
Four Things You Can Do To Help Someone Cope With Child Loss
People who have not experienced the loss of a child are uncomfortable talking about loss with those who experienced the ultimate tragedy. This includes friends as well as family members. In the words of one of my grief support group participants ‘They don’t want to hear about it. They just can’t handle it.’ It’s a... Continue Reading →
Another Purim Without My Son
Tomorrow is Jacob’s yahrzeit and I'm preparing for another Purim without my son. Why did he leave this world close to the happiest day on the Jewish calendar? It’s four years since he suddenly passed away at age 24 of heart failure. As always, I have immense trouble dealing with his passing, and more so... Continue Reading →
My Son, My Friend – Thoughts on a Yahrzeit
My son’s yahrzeit is coming up again. Yes, again. It comes around every year. It’s hard to believe that it will be four years since he passed away. Our family lost a wonderful son, brother, and uncle. In honor of his yahrzeit, I want to share some thoughts about him. When I lost my adult child,... Continue Reading →
Birthdays and Baby Names
First of all, I want to share the wonderful news that my husband and I are grandparents of twin boys born to Jacob’s brother Adam and his wife on the fourth night of Chanukah. In addition to the joy we feel over the birth of these little guys, it’s also bittersweet in that our son... Continue Reading →
Shabbat Isn’t the Same Without My Son – Memories of a Grieving Mom
Shabbat is a beautiful day, an island in time, in which I relax and connect with G-d. I enjoy the special foods, prayers, and having time to learn. I like preparing for Shabbat. I enjoy the smell of a hot crockpot filled with cholent on Friday afternoon. However, Shabbat is also emotionally hard for me.... Continue Reading →
4 Things I Learned From My Grief Therapist
As I mentioned in the post Therapy for Traumatic Grief, finding the right grief therapist can be challenging. Sometimes it takes working with a few before the right one comes along. After I lost my child, finally found a good therapist who taught me several methods to help cope with loss. In the words of... Continue Reading →
Coping with Prolonged Grief for Bereaved Parents
Grief comes in many forms for different people. Those who have lost a sibling, spouse, or parent experience grief differently from those who suffer grief due to child loss. Mental health professionals categorize grief into several types. One of these types is prolonged grief, a grief experienced by most bereaved parents. This article discusses the... Continue Reading →
Trying to Find Purpose in the Death of a Child
I’m a member of an exclusive club. It’s called the child loss club. I didn't ask to join it. The dues are extremely high. Sometimes the dues are so high I wonder how I’ll get through another month. I’ve tried reaching out to the membership office (aka Heaven) but no one answers, so I can’t... Continue Reading →